I've recently come out of a long term relationship and now when I'm alone I feel like I've lost everything. What can I do to fill the empty void?

It is hard when you come out of a long term relationship and it’s very easy to feel like everything has been lost, but it hasn’t. Instead of focusing on the things you perceive you have lost how about focusing on the things you have. First of all start a daily journal writing everything you are grateful for, you might like to do this morning and night. When you are in a state of gratitude it’s impossible to feel negative at the same time.

Secondly, whenever you feel a pang of loss think about what actually is it that you perceive as missing, then have a look where you have it in your life. For example where else in your life do you feel love, where else in your life do you get support, where else in your life do you feel intimacy? It’s always there in some shape or form you just have to look for it. Friends and family often all give us what we want but split up over different people.


Lastly start planning in to do things that make you smile, make a list of 50 things you love to do, ensure there are lots of easy things to do there and things you haven’t done in a while. For example on my list would be baking cakes, roller skating, walking along the Thames and going to the Tate Modern, going to Brighton for the day etc Then plan in to do at least one of these things each week. Actually schedule it into your diary. Planning to do things that make you happy and doing them will help to lift your spirits.

Please contact me for a free coaching session to talk things through and work out an action plan to feeling great again!